Joe Valentino is; the Blast From The Past: This Clown Prince Of Rock & Roll. Warns: mothers lock up your daughters, husbands tie up your wives. When question arises, “Who put the bomp?” There is only one answer!! Joe Valentino. “The man who put the hot dog, in the bun!” The man who put Rock! in, Roll! You’ve heard of “The Big Bopper!” Well here’s “The Big Whopper!”
Good evening ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the one and only Joe Valentino Show. Tonight you guys and dolls are in for a real treat. This is the music variety show that you all been waiting for. Where you will see him rock you; sock you, and even pop you.
You’ll see why Joe Valentino was so famous at Canarie Island, Pituitary Hill! He moves, he slides, he even sighs. He’s out of this world. For he will steal that girl. The one that you’ve all been waiting for. We’re going to bring out that fabulous sensation, that unnatural phenomenon, Joe Valentino.
He’s appeared at the Aladdin Hotel in Las Vegas, he tore them apart in Utah, he killed them in Mississippi; he was found missing a shirt button in every state; from here to Tupedo! He got caught greasin’ up his rod in Alamba!! That’s right, Alamba. He was found in a field wearing nothing but petals ladies!!
The newest sensation, the boy with the beat, the atomic powered singer, the one with the nuclear fission in his pants, which become obvious in his dance. The greatest entertainer, the boy who carried comedy in his back pocket. The blast from the past. The crown prince of rock and roll. That wonderful the incomparable, that famous man; the one and only Joe Valentino will be here shortly to knock your socks off folks.